Suffer On Your Own

I take a deep breath
Savor it's warm, earthy taste
I won't let this moment
Go to total waste

Standing here now
With  hands over heart
I'm trying to figure out
Where I will start

Can you rebuild a city
After it has started to decay?
Can you restart a life
After you wasted every day?

Time is lost
Never will it be found
I feel like I was still running
When I hit the ground

Dry, bitter dreams
Crumble to dust in my palm
Everything is wrong, different
Destroyed by a metaphorical bomb

I can hear it explode
It pounds in my ears
Makes me relive my past
Never to forget my fears

I can hear the words
Hate dripping off every letter
After so much pain and torment
How do I change my life for the better

I have nothing to offer
Only the pain in this soul
I feel unsure, frightened
Weak as a new born foal

All I want is to forget
Forget every stabbing word he said
Forget how I cried myself to sleep
Wimpering in my own bed

Robbed of happiness
Cheated out of joy
I bet you still wish
That you could have had a boy

Many dissappointments
One right after another
Maybe there will be less
Now that I'm with my mother

Enjoy being alone
I know that I couldn't
Now I'm doing all of the things
You said I shouldn't